While the world that we live in is full of splendor and beauty, it’s also true that there is brokenness and a lot that isn’t right. We find that we aren’t at rest or peace. Through our work or accomplishments, we strive to feel accepted, worthy, secure, seen, and heard. When success comes, we find ourselves feeling a fleeting sense of rest, then we start all over again. In this context, counseling for men can be helpful.
The apostle was right when he wrote that the creation is groaning, and even those who hope in Jesus are also groaning inwardly as they await the renewal of all things (Romans 8:22-25). There’s help available to us when we need it. Having others to walk with makes the journey easier, whether we are celebrating the joys of life or mourning the tragedies and hardships that mark our lives. Counseling is one of the forms of help that’s available.
Counseling for men: Some challenges and opportunities
Men struggle with a wide range of issues and concerns. Millions of men struggle with anxiety disorders, depression, relationship issues, anger management issues, fear of abandonment, and much more. These affect how a man thinks about himself and others, and how he acts in everyday life. These concerns can affect a man’s ability to flourish and have a healthy, well-balanced life.
One of the challenges that men face is that they are socialized to be self-sufficient and to learn how to handle problems on their own. There’s often a stigma attached to a man not being able to handle things on his own.
Many of the role models and heroes that the culture puts forward for men to emulate are the types who take care of their business by themselves. The hardened warrior, the cowboy, or the survivalist guy finds his own solutions to problems without help.
The tragic result of this socialization and the stigma of finding help is that when he struggles, he feels he has no other course of action besides toughing it out and making a plan. Looking to a friend or for counseling becomes a last resort. Many men don’t look for the help they so desperately need, and it often means they struggle with highly treatable conditions.
The conversation around counseling and mental health has been shifting in a positive direction. Many influential men have in recent years spoken freely about their challenges with conditions such as anxiety, depression, autism spectrum disorder, or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). Speaking out like this helps to create an environment of transparency and vulnerability, making it easier for other men to seek help.
The place of counseling in mental health
Counseling often takes the form of talk therapy. In talk therapy, also known as psychotherapy, a man will meet with his counselor once or twice per week for approximately an hour per session. The counselor will create an environment in which that man feels comfortable and can share what’s going on in his life. Professional counselors are trained to be non-judgmental and to effectively address their client’s concerns.
Some men find it hard to admit any form of what they would consider weakness in front of others in their circle. Fear of being shamed by his peers or loved ones can prevent a man from admitting that he has a problem. This makes it hard to talk to the people closest to him. A counselor is an impartial professional who doesn’t know their client personally. That makes it easier for clients to share what’s going on in their lives with the counselor.
Talking through what’s happening in your life helps in several ways. It forces you to develop a working vocabulary for your thoughts and feelings. Being able to name the problem allows you to start getting a handle on it. When you talk about what you’re going through with someone, they can help to give you perspective. Likewise, they can challenge faulty thinking and unhelpful behavior that could be contributing to the problem.
Additionally, your counselor can guide you in developing tools that improve your ability to communicate, handle conflict productively, cope effectively with the symptoms you’re experiencing, nurture a good network or support system, and develop strategies to flourish in everyday life. In combination with medication where it is necessary, counseling is an integral part of an effective treatment plan.
A first step
Though there has been a stigma around men seeking help, things are changing for the better. Counseling is an effective way to address a wide range of concerns that men face. Whatever challenge you might be facing at the moment, reach out to us at Longview Christian Counseling in Washington today. We will arrange an appointment for you to seek help from a counselor in Longview, Washington. Begin your journey toward healing today!
“Rocky Shore”, Courtesy of Josh Hild, Unsplash.com, CC0 License
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Kate Motaung: Curator
Kate Motaung is the Senior Writer, Editor, and Content Manager for a multi-state company. She is the author of several books including Letters to Grief, 101 Prayers for Comfort in Difficult Times, and A Place to Land: A Story of Longing and Belonging...
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